PDA

View Full Version : The wife says......


Buck
01-01-2009, 02:53 PM
Oh, so,so true........


The wife says: You want
The wife means: You want

The wife says: We need
The wife means: I want

The wife says: It's your decision
The wife means: The correct decision should be obvious

The wife says: Do what you want
The wife means: You'll pay for this later

The wife says: We need to talk
The wife means: I need to complain

The wife says: Sure... go ahead
The wife means: I don't want you to

The wife says: I'm not upset
The wife means: Of course I'm upset you moron

The wife says: You're so manly
The wife means: You need a shave and sure do sweat a lot

The wife says: Be romantic, turn out the lights
The wife means: I have flabby thighs

The wife says: This kitchen is so inconvenient
The wife means: I want a new house

The wife says: I want new curtains
The wife means: ...and carpeting, wallpaper, and furniture.

The wife says: I need wedding shoes
The wife means: The other forty pairs of white ones are the wrong shade

The wife says: I heard a noise
The wife means: I noticed you were almost asleep, and am not finished with you yet

The wife says: Do you love me?
The wife means: I'm going to ask for something expensive

The wife says: How much do you love me?
The wife means: I did something you're not going to like

The wife says: I'll be ready in a minute
The wife means: I'll be ready in an hour

The wife says: Am I fat?
The wife means: Tell me I'm beautiful

The wife says: You have to learn to communicate
The wife means: Agree with me

The wife says: Are you listening to me?
The wife means: [Too late, you're doomed.]

The wife says: Yes
The wife means: No

The wife says: No
The wife means: No

The wife says: Maybe
The wife means: No

The wife says: I'm sorry
The wife means: You'll be sorry

The wife says: Do you like this recipe?
The wife means: Get used to it

The wife says: All I'm going to get is a soap dish
The wife means: I'm coming back with enough to fill this place

The wife says: Was that the baby?
The wife means: Get out of bed and check on him

----

In answer to the question "What's wrong?" ---

The wife says: The same old thing
The wife means: Nothing

The wife says: Nothing
The wife means: Everything

The wife says: Nothing... really
The wife means: You can't really be THAT stupid, can you?

The wife says: I don't want to talk about it
The wife means: I'm still building up steam

remington
01-07-2009, 09:16 PM
Buck, I hardly ever agree with you politically but this I gotta agree on. Man law #1 Do not try to understand women, it is impossible.