The Dirty old man [Archive]

Sebastian_Haff

01-15-2009, 07:40 AM

That's me of course....

Went out for a late lunch yesterday. It being wednesday, I did LJS and got a deep fried flounder combo meal. No, I ain't a card carrying mackrel snapper, but I usually eat some kind of seafood on wednesday.

So I'm sitting in a booth chowin' down when I notice two college age decent looking chicks carrying trays and looking for a place to sit. They picked a booth a short distance from mine. One of 'em went to the drink machine and on the way back to the booth dropped her cup lid. She bent over and I eyeballed her nice looking ass crack above which was the usual "tramp stamp". Her companion saw me looking and said something to Ms Ass Crack. She looked over at me and called me a pervert. I just nodded my head and I swear she started to blush. I didn't think that girls did that anymore.

What the hell ya gonna do?

Ya look at a decent looking slut who shows off her body and they get riled up. Ya don't look and they think ya are blind or senile or some such sh!t.

RangerRick

01-15-2009, 10:25 AM

Now you know good and well Tramp Stamp Tracie gave ya eye full because of the pleasure it gave her to be exhibiting her only redeeming quality for the world to see. When that's all ya got goin for ya, that's what ya show.

;)

Rick

Michael32170

01-15-2009, 11:50 AM

The modern way is that only selected people are allowed to look. You know how it is, when you turn 40, you change from a healthy male to a dirty old man.

indyguy

01-15-2009, 12:38 PM

any gal I know who is a real lady kneels to pick up something off the floor.

not bend over like joe the plumber. If she was willing to show it off in public I would have looked also.

Wyobuckaroo

01-15-2009, 02:59 PM

Problem is............. There are whole lot of the girls with the "Tramp Stamp" that don't look near as good as they thought it would when they got it put on.

Now I'm built more like "Larry the Cable Guy" than "Fabio" or any other of those girl toys. But think I have the common sense to not ware the low riders and other stylish rags that would be used to show off something like that.

KnowwhatImean
Wyo (dirty old man, and proud of it)

swampyankee

01-15-2009, 03:42 PM

wow 40 is the cutoff? I though I had a few more years, turns out I been in the club for 2 years already. Where do I pick up my membership card? ;D

gregabob

01-15-2009, 08:45 PM

I'm well practiced at being 'discrete' when observing nubile ladies....although Sebastian it seems you got 'busted' by her accomplice ::) Sometimes it's more fun to pretend to ignore them and watch the reaction. 8) Got an eyeful of a young lady at the credit union today-she had no idea... and I was facing her the whole time... :P
I find watching 'body language' to be fascinating. Ever had a gal raise her arms over her head and put her hands behind her neck for a second while you're talking to her? Or notice a gal tilt her head and give you her full attention while absently twirling her hair? How about her crossing her arms and averting her eyes? Or fluffing her hair for no apparent reason? All clues, some more subtle than others, but the kicker is most of the time they don't realize what they're doing! We just have to pay attention guys, gals talk to us in many ways..... ;)

swampyankee

01-16-2009, 09:12 AM

Don't forget when they talk to you with pepper spray, that comes across lound and clear too :'(

DonnaKay

01-18-2009, 04:02 PM

The modern way is that only selected people are allowed to look. You know how it is, when you turn 40, you change from a healthy male to a dirty old man.

This may be true but I also know that a man also gets to an age where he can do or say whatever he wants and get away with it.

I dress very conservatively for work. One of my jobs is to check my patients feet. I was squating down slightly bent over my elderly patients feet when he says "I can see your boobs!" I immediately pulled my shirt tight to me and apologized....his reply "no I liked it" before I could protest he hooked his finger into the top of my shirt and pulled it back down. I promptly pulled it back up and he says in a pouting voice..."I should have never said anything!" I didn't hold it against him.

The next time I came to see him I used double sided tape to tape my shirt to my chest.

Now do you think he could have gotten away with that is he wasn't an old man.

flatwater

01-18-2009, 05:07 PM

It's a good thing you didn't hold it against him. If you did he would have asked you for a date (Joke) It reminds me of the time a cute young waitress served my wife and me some coffee. She came back and asked me for a warm up. I said I didn't think so because I hardly know you. She walked away with red cheeks , I laughed and my wife slapped me on the back of the head

gregabob

01-18-2009, 06:32 PM

sbemt456

01-18-2009, 07:00 PM

;D Flatwater that was funny! Cant wait till I get to slap my hubby in back of the head, then I can be sure he is still very much alive and functioning.

stella

cookiecache

01-20-2009, 01:18 AM

When I turned 41 I went back to get myself a couple of more years of University education. I didn't have any problems being around all of the young women even though I was newly single, but I was very careful about what I said and made sure I didn't get caught looking places that would make them nervous.

But, one day a very attractive young woman and I were leaving class, and I commented that it took too long to get to our next shared class on the other side of the campus. She just gave me a little smile and said, "Not for me!" "Want a ride." I looked around to make sure no one I knew would see me get into the car with a girl more than 20 years younger than myself. We no sooner got in her car than she was dialing her cell phone while backing out into traffic. Then she cut across some grass to get on the access road to the city streets. Time for her to check her make-up, and me to frantically look for the seatbelt buckle buried under Taco Bell wrappers. Rather than driving across campus like I normally would, she took us on the main city thoroughfare driving about 80mph and texting another friend while sorting her notes for the next class.

I arrived at the next class only one minute late instead of my usual two, but the professor asked if I was feeling well. I said, "I'm alive... by the grace of god, I'm alive."

Michael32170

01-20-2009, 05:21 AM

This may be true but I also know that a man also gets to an age where he can do or say whatever he wants and get away with it.

I dress very conservatively for work. *One of my jobs is to check my patients feet. *I was squating down slightly bent over my elderly patients feet when he says "I can see your boobs!" *I immediately pulled my shirt tight to me and apologized....his reply "no I liked it" before I could protest he hooked his finger into the top of my shirt and pulled it back down. *I promptly pulled it back up and he says in a pouting voice..."I should have never said anything!" *I didn't hold it against him.

The next time I came to see him I used double sided tape to tape my shirt to my chest.

Now do you think he could have gotten away with that is he wasn't an old man.

Was he a dirty old man?

Iwoots

01-21-2009, 05:34 AM

Flatwater, did your wife slap you up side the head w/ her hand, or a purse w/ a brick in? And how long before you regained consciousness?? ;D

DonnaKay

01-21-2009, 06:42 AM

Was he a dirty old man?

That's my point....after a certain age you no longer a dirty old man....your "fresh" or even "cute"

Wyobuckaroo

01-21-2009, 03:30 PM

Donna

If getting "cute" means getting an occasional good natured grope or the like..................

When does that start ......... ???

Wyo (looking forward to this)

flatwater

01-21-2009, 06:18 PM

Well I'm to old to be fresh and to ugly to be cute But darn it, just because there's snow on the mountain top does mean the volcano is dead :o I mean I may not be as good as I once was but once I'm as good as I always was. 8)

MontanaQuilter

02-05-2009, 09:41 PM

Ya'll are hillarious! Some of my favorite ppl are dirty old men...they take advantage of us thinking they're harmless ;)

Global_Gal

03-17-2009, 11:16 PM

any gal I know who is a real lady kneels to pick up something off the floor.

not bend over like joe the plumber. If she was willing to show it off in public I would have looked also.

It's called the Bunny Dip. When I started bartending in the early 70's the skirts were short and you learn real fast how to pick up something dropped on the floor.

Hey at least the girl did pick up the lid and not just leave it there. ;)