Some bad jokes...

[macgeoghagen]

Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other "how do you drive this thing?"

An octopus walks into a bar and says "I can play any musical instrument you let me". The band is there and they say "OK". They give him a banjo, he plays it well, They give him a Trumpet, he plays a nice solo. Then they gave him a set of bagpipes. He fumbles around a bit, and cant seem to figure it out. The band leader says "We're tired of waiting, play them or not". The octopus says "What do you mean, play? I'm trying to figure out how to take her clothes off!"

Two potatoes are in an oven. One says "man its hot in here". The other says "wow! a talking potato!"

And some anti-jokes:

Whats worse than a werewolf in drag?..............terminal cancer.

A priest, a rabbi, and an atheist walk into a bar. The bar tender says "what a nice example of people putting aside their differences and being tolerant of one anothers' diverse spiritual perspectives."

[bopperman]

President Obama , Pope Benedict , and a boyscout were flying back to DC after one of Barrys big speeches . Halfway back and about 25000 feet up the pilot called back and told them the engines had both lost power and they were going down and to put on the emergency parachutes and jump . President Obama grabbed one of only two chutes hanging on the wall and told the Pope , "I'm sorry Pope but I have to have one of these parachutes . The world needs me much more than you or the boy and besides that , I'm the worlds smartest black man" At which time he jumped out the door . The Pope looked at the boyscout and said , " Well sonny , you have a long life ahead of you and mine is about over . You take the remainig parachute ." The boyscout answered ,Don't worry Pope Benedict . The smartest black man in world just jumped out with my backpack. The other parachute is under my seat .