View Full Version : How to get spouse on board?

10-21-2014, 05:08 PM
Just can't seem to get DH on board with paying down debt and saving money toward our own place.
He is like a whiny kid "I work hard, I deserve ..." what ever it is. No self control at all. Today is breezy and it was cold this morning. But tomorrow I am going to get our things out of storage, where he has several coats. And the boss just gave him a coat, but the zipper doesn't work. So could he possibly wait until Monday when I get back? No, he went and spent $100 on yet another coat. I waited until my tennis shoes had holes in (like toes showing) before I found new ones on sale. Everything the kid and I wear is either outlet (his jeans $11 a pair on sale at outlet) or thrift store.
And it is so hard to save any money as it is, then he pulls stupid crap like this :mad:

10-21-2014, 05:22 PM
Boy, that is a tough one, but I have seen it before. You just have two different philosophies. You could start stashing cash and stuff a little at a time without his knowledge--don't bring it up, just start saving a little and there won't be as much for him to spend. You could ask the credit cards (if there are any) to reduce the limit as you start to pay them off so he doesn't just continue to spend. There are always differences in opinion between spouses, but you can work them out if you are careful to pick your battles.

Tim Horton
10-22-2014, 02:00 PM
My experience was..... You can't get people to change if they don't want to...
I couldn't make any head way with a situation like that...

Now that I don't have that kind of a burden anymore.... I can manage resources to the best benefit for me....

There is no easy answer... But like said, slowly building your self a cash stash cushion is a good place to start......

Good luck....

10-29-2014, 05:49 PM
We don't keep credit cards ... he has no control and I don't believe in them. I do stash a little cash, but I want someone who partners with me on decisions... of course when dd's grandmother (the grands raised him) died, grandpa had no idea who got paid for power or insurance, etc. Since one of the kids moved in and fleeced grandpa, you would think DD would have learned a lesson...