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Go Back   BHM Forum > After Sunset > Humor

Humor G or PG-rated humor only. Post adult humor in the Extended Access section.

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  #1  
Old 11-08-2012, 04:37 PM
CarolAnn's Avatar
CarolAnn Female CarolAnn is offline
Grand Master Pontificator
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 4,781
Default Memos I want to send - with all my heart

All -

Part of my job is to serve you in all things that are conventionally considered “women’s work”. Therefore, if you cannot find time to take your dirty dishes and put them in the DISHWASHER, please send me an email and let me know so that I can stop by your desk and pick them up to be cleaned for you.

Coming soon: Grand “Unable to Comprehend Sarcasm” Award. The winner gets a personalized certificate and a smack on the back of the head.


_ _ _


All -
By now, you are well aware that I have to have beverages chilled for executive meetings, and that those beverages are designated with a sign "For MEETINGS" in the break room refrigerator. You are probably also aware that many people feel these sodas and bottled water should be free for all no matter how they are labeled.


So it is to those people I say: I am sorry. I apologize for gluing the soda cans to the box. I am truly sorry for the glue trap that I also epoxied to the cans inside the box. I realize it was a naughty thing to do and I promise I won't do it again.


Next time I will inject one of the cans with laxitive and reseal it. Drink up at your own risk.
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  #2  
Old 11-09-2012, 11:06 PM
macgeoghagen macgeoghagen is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Wherever theres liberty.
Posts: 758
Default

Memo I have sent:

MEMORANDUM FOR: ALCON

FROM: [redacted]

SUBJECT: ACCURACY

1. Please do not piss on the seat.



ROY J. OBVIOUS, Capt., USAF


Memo I have sent:

MEMORANDUM FOR: A1C [redacted]

FROM: SSGT [redacted]

SUBJECT: SHUT UP MORE OFTEN

1. If you find that you have the option to keep your mouth shut, take it.



[name redacted] SSgt., USAF
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