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Old 01-21-2016, 10:25 PM
Doninalaska Doninalaska is offline
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Default A wife is missing...

Subject: reporting a missing wife

Husband went to the sheriff's department to report that his wife was missing.

Husband: My wife is missing. She went shopping yesterday and has not come home...
Sergeant: What is her height?

Husband: Gee, I'm not sure. A little over five-feet tall.
Sergeant: Weight?

Husband: Don't know. Not slim, not really fat.
Sergeant: Color of eyes?
Husband: Sort of brown I think. Never really noticed.
Sergeant: Color of hair?

Husband: Changes a couple times a year. Maybe dark brown now. I can't remember.
Sergeant: What was she wearing?
Husband: Could have been pants, or maybe a skirt or shorts. I don't know exactly.

Sergeant: What kind of car did she go in?
Husband: She went in my truck.
Sergeant: What kind of truck was it?
Husband: A 2015 Ford F150 King Ranch 4X4 with eco-boost 5.0L V8 engine special ordered with manual transmission and climate controlled air conditioning. It has a custom matching white cover for the bed, which has a matching aftermarket bed liner. Custom leather 6-way seats and "Bubba" floor mats. Trailering package with gold hitch and special wiring hook-ups. DVD with full GPS navigation, satellite radio receiver, 23-channel CB radio, six cup holders, a USB port, and four power outlets. I added special alloy wheels and off-road Michelins. It has custom running boards and indirect wheel well lighting.

At this point the husband started choking up.

Sergeant: Don't worry buddy. We'll find your truck.
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  #2  
Old 01-22-2016, 09:23 AM
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Ciderman Male Ciderman is offline
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Good one I liked it.
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  #3  
Old 01-23-2016, 12:08 PM
newbiehal Male newbiehal is offline
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Talking missing wife

Aw, Cmon, no true truck guy could describe his wife that well.
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Old 01-23-2016, 02:11 PM
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backlash Male backlash is offline
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I was a new repair guy at a hospital and one of the OR X-Ray techs told me about a problem.
I relayed the problem to her boss.
Boss asked me who reported the problem and I said I didn't know her name.
So they started trying to figure it out.
They were all women by the way.
Did she have dark hair or blond. No idea.
Did she have on makeup or not. No idea.
Then one of the women said he's a man then asked big boobs or small.
I said big, they all said that's Paula.
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