Top Navigation  
 
U.S. Flag waving
Office Hours Momday - Friday  8 am - 5 pm Pacific 1-800-835-2418
 
Facebook   YouTube   Twitter
 

Features
 Home Page
 Current Issue
 Article Index
 Author Index
 Previous Issues
 Print Display Ads
 Print Classifieds
 Newsletter
 Letters
 Humor
 Free Stuff
 Recipes
 Home Energy

General Store
 Ordering Info
 Subscriptions
 Kindle Subscriptions
 Kindle Publications
 Anthologies
 Books
 Back Issues
 Help Yourself
 All Specials
 Classified Ad

Advertise
 Web Site Ads
 Magazine Ads

BHM Blogs
 Ask Jackie Clay
 Massad Ayoob
 Claire Wolfe
 Where We Live
 Dave on Twitter
Retired Blogs
 Behind The Scenes
 Oliver Del Signore
 David Lee
 James Kash
 Energy Questions

Quick Links
 Home Energy Info
 Jackie Clay
 Ask Jackie Online
 Dave Duffy
 Massad Ayoob
 John Silveira
 Claire Wolfe

Forum / Chat
 Forum/Chat Info
 Enter Forum
 Lost Password

More Features
 Contact Us/
 Change of Address
 Write For BHM
 Meet The Staff
 Meet The Authors
 Disclaimer and
 Privacy Policy


Retired Features
 Country Moments
 Links
 Feedback
 Radio Show


Link to BHM

Living Freedom by Claire Wolfe. Musings about personal freedom and finding it within ourselves.

Want to Comment on a blog post? Look for and click on the blue No Comments or # Comments at the end of each post.



Archive for the ‘Humor’ Category

Claire Wolfe

Friday links

Friday, April 8th, 2016
  • Talk about swords into plowshares! California city government v*tes to turn a former prison into a cannabis oil factory.
  • Super high-tech tiny house. Pretty cool. (Helps to be a boatbuilder and cabinetmaker.) But c’mon. How much did it cost? (H/T MJR)
  • :-) How not to take a gun selfie.
  • And speaking of selfies, I assume this study (which concludes — wow, whodathunkit? — that narcissists are more likely to post and crave feedback on selfies) must have been funded by government. Not ours, fortunately.
  • And speaking of governments: who’s named in the Panama Papers? Named so far, we should add. The silence on U.S.-based clients of Mossack Fonseca is like waiting for that second shoe to drop.
  • OTOH, the astute Megan McArdle says that what the papers reveal so far is a positive reflection on capitalism.
  • Ronald T. Richie. He was the 911 caller who got the perfectly innocent John Crawford SWATted and killed. Maybe he’ll finally pay a price. Maybe.
  • Sheesh. This article on why women should v*te for women makes me not ever want to v*te for a woman again. Well, not that I ever gave a crap about the sex of a candidate. And not that I’d ever v*te for a woman if the woman were Hillary. Or Dianne. Or … well, most of them.
  • But the good news is that even Salon says Hillary’s world is collapsing around her.
  • I really hate questions like this. But with the weekend coming up, here’s some food for thought during your leisure hours: Are we living in a computer simulation?
  • Just because we were talking about flame-throwers the other day …
Claire Wolfe

Weekend links and news of the weird

Saturday, April 2nd, 2016

Sorrys in advance for being unable to remember now where I got some of these links. I’ve been saving them up for a while. So thanks to The Usual Suspects. :-)

  • Wanna set up a pot business? Become a nun.
  • Chase Bank holds funds and reports customer to the feds for paying his dog walker.
  • Joel got to this one first, but it’s too pure-and-simply wonderful not to re-blog: the mystery of the squatter in the woods who came and left with no trace. Ghostery to the max!
  • But this … once again takes “small-space living” to crazy extremes. Only in San Francisco. Or New York City. Or London. Or other places that have become hellholes for normal people.
  • Kevin Wilmeth comments on my TZP “constitutional carry” piece and gets it exactly right: “The only downside I can see, honestly, is that celebrating a good thing for what it is, isn’t going to help the sort of prag mindset that still can’t distinguish between long-term strategy and true pre-emptive surrender.”
  • “Sorry, but the real unemployment rate is 9.8%” Srsly? you think it’s that low?
  • Oh brother, someday this crass little millennial will regret his stupid, arrogant words about old people and guns.
  • OTOH … ouch. Stupid, angry people and guns are another matter.
  • Finally, an accurate scale model of the U.S. government. Only not dangerous enough. Or complicated enough. And more purposeful, even if nobody has any idea what the purpose is.
Claire Wolfe

Got them old post-caucus Easter Peeps blues …

Tuesday, March 29th, 2016

‘Lection News

Yeah, I’m late to the news, but boy that was a lot of v*ters feeling the Bern last weekend. If Hillary and her superdelegates manage to hold on to the nomination through sheer force of establishmentarianism, what’s her slogan going to be?

“Almost a mandate!”

“Not a mandate, but I still won, suckers.”

“Corruption pays!”

“Suck it up; you’re stuck with me.”

“You don’t have to like me. You don’t have to trust me. But you better v*te for me in the general election ’cause the alternative’s even scarier.”

“Mine’s still bigger than The Donald’s.”

—–

Speaking of The Donald’s, is it true that Larry Flynt has invited Trump to come in and have the item he boasted of at that debate “scientifically” measured?

Friends who came over for Easter brunch swear it’s so. I didn’t even realize Flynt was still alive.

But if so, his slogan is easy: “Still tasteless after all these years.”

—–

But as somebody hinted in comments a few weeks ago, our motto is likely to be more along the lines of “Clowns to the left of us, jokers to the right … or vice versa.”

—–

Peeps! And microwaves.

It being Easter, my guests turned up with a box of Peeps (BLUE Peeps, thus the title of this post) and a chocolate “Peter Cottontail,” complete with storybook (which is currently in the freezer along with the choco-wabbit).

And my friends had NO idea about the almost magical properties of Peeps when fired upon at the range! Oh boy, have they got some fun ahead — and now, post Easter, all those Peeps will be half price.

My friends had, at least, heard rumors about what happens if you put a Peep in the microwave (an experiment I declined to try, referring them to YouTube, where everything possible either already has been or will soon be done to some poor Peep).

Before leaving they confessed they had once put a container of gasoline inside an operating microwave in the middle of a field, testing the theory that the vapors would eventually expand from the heat, possibly ignite, and blow the microwave to smithereens. Or at least blast the door off. When nothing happened, they then shot at the microwave with .22s and ended up murdering the microwave’s motor before discovering whether the gasoline would turn the appliance inside-out.

“It’s a guy thing,” the husband explained. I’m not so sure. The wife and at least one set of parents participated.

Ah! Good, clean fun. It’s sad how dead set the fedgov is on preventing anybody from blowing anything up, even such educational purposes.

—–

Both my friends used to have jobs in county government and even though they’re out of that now, their F*c*b**k friends are still heavily into law enforcement and other such interesting activities. He was shaking his head over the authoritarian “right-wing” rantings of one local police chief (“but at least he’s pro-gun, so that’s something”).

As a lot of others have done lately, my friends have de-politicized themselves, and they’d like to be away from the ranting. But once you’re on FB, how do you (dare) unfriend a police chief? This could be very bad for your long-term health.

—–

Their de-politization extended even to getting rid of their old Loompanics books and their copy of The Anarchist’s Cookbook on the theory that if they’re not actually going to do anything subversive they don’t want to get caught with “subversive literature” should TS ever HTF in any personal way.

Only problem is, of course, that virtually any literature beyond Maeve Binchy novels and Fifty Shades of Gray can get you labeled subversive when Authoritah has a mind to do the labeling. The Hunger Games or Harry Potter? Tres anti-authoritarian. Encouraging kids to rebel against established authority. Books on edible wild plants or expedient shelters? You crazy survivalist, you. Nice little Mormon guides to putting food by? Reloading manuals? And Boy Scout manuals! Oh my, don’t even think about the implications of those.

—–

Speaking of literature (and other things), thanks for continuing to use my Amazon links with such enthusiasm even durning this time of “lite” blogging. I’m doing my darnedest to keep the blogging as worthwhile as ever, even if it’s not every day. Your v*te of confidence is much appreciated.

—–

Oh, one last thing. I’ll have a piece at The Zelman Partisans Tuesday morning. It should post about 5:00 a.m. I’m prepping this ahead of time so can’t directly link to it. But it’ll be there. Enjoy. (UPDATE: Didn’t post until 10:30 since I screwed up. But hope you enjoyed the new post by Carl-Bear and the poll Nicki posted earlier.)

—–

So … what acts of violence have you committed against poor, helpless Peeps, elderly microwaves, or other inanimate objects?

Hope you had a great Easter.

Claire Wolfe

Just a little catching up

Tuesday, March 22nd, 2016

Another Darwin runner up

If this is actually true (and Snopes hasn’t pronounced otherwise), it truly belongs in the Department of Stupidity Archives: Motorist tries to drive through a Roadrunner tunnel. (H/T MJR)

—–

Constitutional carry moves ahead

« Read the rest of this entry »

Claire Wolfe

Monday links

Monday, February 15th, 2016
  • Meet Twitter’s new thought police. Incredible (but not surprising in this anti-free speech day) that a company that lives or dies on the quality of its public forum of ideas would do this.
  • Your brain: it may work better in winter. Now my brain, on the other hand …
  • Bernie-ites! You want socialism? Here’s socialism.
  • “Media Matters Not.” The big “progressive watchdog” goes after the little old Zelman Partisans, distorting all the way. Bear Bussjaeger says thanks.
  • Narcissism.
  • And speaking of which: Hillary. (This is actually pretty funny.)
  • The Robin Hood of science is pulling scientific papers from behind paywalls and making them available to researchers everywhere in the world.
  • The Christian Science Monitor covers free-range education.
Claire Wolfe

In the “don’t try this at home” department

Wednesday, February 3rd, 2016

This is refreshing in this day and age: The joy of blowing up your lab partner.

And …

U.S. Capitol cops have to abandon their shooting range after “safety” improvements caused unsafe conditions. (And what’s that about getting a little nick at the corner of your eye, fella? Not wearing your goggles, were you???) (H/T Jim Bovard)

Claire Wolfe

Friday links

Friday, January 29th, 2016
  • “Ayn Rand Made Me a Communist.” Um … you’d probably have to be a regular New Republic reader and already know how Jacob Bacharach is one; he doesn’t actually explain, except in a vague-ish indirect way. It’s still an interesting essay, though.
  • Question not asked: If this homeless guy can do all this, then why is he homeless?
  • Not a bad analysis of how the R-Party is coming apart at the seams. Leaves out factors you and I know well, but seems right in its basics.
  • Georgia state representative commits civil disobedience to get medical marijuana to sick kids.
  • Yeah, it’s a Communist hellhole. So we’ll open and close today’s news with Commies. But Cuba is beautiful, as these aerial photos show. And ohhhh, those empty white-sand beaches! This link was sent to me by a Panamanian taxista who helped make my couple of days in Panama City six years ago a pleasure. I’m pretty sure he’s been to Cuba.

And a bonus: Canada for President, courtesy of MJR, who knows a thing or two about all that. NB: Brief NSFW language.

Claire Wolfe

Thursday links

Thursday, January 21st, 2016
  • At The Zelman Partisans, Nicki lauds the young Pakistani professor who used his firearm to protect his students from a terrorist attack.
  • Killing the golden goose of capitalism.
  • And speaking (as we were earlier this week and above) about the way bad law and regulation ultimagely discourage everyone and everything, NHTSA regulators are trying to destroy the Elio before it even goes into production. (H/T jed)
  • Okay. I’m sure this is humorous.
  • Now, this, on the other hand I’m not so certain about. (Both links courtesy of Y.B.)
  • No wonder college students are so eager to destroy free speech and create segregated “safe spaces.” They’re taught beans about history or civics. Be sure to check out the stats beginning on page 4, if you do nothing else.
  • Gun buyers have broken NICS. The FBI is responding by refusing to consider appeals of wrongful denials. Since 90-some percent of denials are wrongful, this is a big deal. (It would be a big constitutional deal even if one denial was wrongful and could not be appealed; but since NICS itself is anti-constitutional, that’s a nitpick.) There will be lawsuits. But this just goes to show you (not that anyone here needed showing) how easy it is for the fedgov, having pushed “law-abiding” people into getting its prior permission, to forbid exercise of an individual right.
  • The headline proclaims a big-deal “new” feature on an upcoming washing machine from Samsung. Which turns out to be a feature that has actually existed on the vast majority of washing machines since Great-Granny’s day. Until “new, improved!” washers with government-mandated energy features and mega-electronic controls broke it. Bet the “new” machine from Samsung will be a heck of a lot more pricy than Granny’s washer, too. And thanks to fedgov rules, It won’t wash as well as Granny’s did, either.
Claire Wolfe

Thursday news

Thursday, January 14th, 2016
  • Will people now have to start watching their “threat scores” the way they have to watch their credit scores? Given the notoriously bad and biased information that goes into marking us as “threats,” that could be a real challenge.
  • Mental Floss tells the story of German teens who rebelled against Hitler. Another fascinating, little-known bit of history.
  • To call it the gun issue even the NRA won’t touch might be an exaggeration. But the problem of non-violent ex-felons being denied gun rights does hit blacks harder than the rest of us. (Thank you, War on Drugs.)
  • Funny timing. Last evening I started reading a 30-year-old tome by a naturalist/environmentalist. He mentioned the then-dire ozone hole; you may remember the OH as the terror that was going to make livestock go blind and give us humans shocking rates of skin cancer. I’d forgotten all about it. Bet you had, too. Then I check my morning news and up pops a Smithsonian piece asking whatever happened to the ozone hole.
  • Ouch. Even if Ammon Bundy manages not to get himself Wacoed, he faces financial oblivion for the Oregon standoff (H/T MJR). Meanwhile, Oath Keepers and III Percenters pay a call on the FBI.
  • Too much suffering and struggle for freedomistas lately. Michael Werecat Dean details how he faces life-threatening health problems while giving his all to Freedom Feens. The Feens audience is generally younger and hipper than most here at BHM, but the show is a wonderful outreach vehicle and MWD has always been a passionate supporter of other freedomistas, including me.
  • For people who complained that her The Book of Barkley: Love and Life Through the Eyes of a Labrador Retriever was more about humans than the dog, Brigid writes a brief “book” about her dog Abby’s thoughts. Hilarious. Because it’s so right.
Claire Wolfe

Weekend links

Saturday, December 26th, 2015
  • Father gets into a stand-off with police to prevent a hospital from taking his “brain dead” son off life support. Happened earlier this year but the follow-up is what’s making this a Christmas-season story.
  • Pot for the homeless. (H/T jed)
  • Also from jed: all the SF books to binge read over the holidays. (Can’t vouch for them myself ’cause I haven’t read any of them. If you’re buying, you know where to purchase them.)
  • Dave Barry’s year in review. (I’ve lost track of the people who’ve sent this one to me; it’s definitely been making the rounds.)
  • Jim Bovard’s Raging Bitch Christmas. Little hard to picture it, but liberty’s professional curmudgeon did a stint as Santa.
  • I don’t always agree with Jonah Goldberg. But when it comes to picking the perfect presidential candidate for these times he might just be onto something.
  • Heaven knows why they’ve tagged this article as “gun violence.” There’s no violence involved — just more Americans wanting and getting guns. I know a lucky lady (not me) who got a brand new Glock from Santa.
  • Speaking of which, don’t forget to take the TZP poll on gun gifting. Even if you already took it once you can answer again with your post-Christmas results.
  • Awww, that’s wonderful. “Fospice” care for dying homeless dogs.
Claire Wolfe

Not exactly traditional, but …

Friday, December 25th, 2015

I wasn’t going to post today, but Jim Bovard tempted me with his Christmas musical finds. And those led me into the darkest depths of YouTubery.

If you want more traditional carols, check out the comment thread on yesterday’s post, where Christmas helpers have been posting links to sublime stuff.

Warning: what follows here may not exactly fall into the “sublime” category.

Jeff Foxworthy’s “12 Redneck Days of Christmas”:

Next up is “Santa Claus is Tapping Your Phone” sung by what appears to be a bunch of drunken members of the Glastonbury Chamber of Commerce:

In case you can’t make our the slurred and mumbled lyrics, here they are (along with other Christmas parodies, some of dubious taste). Thanks, Jim.

This next song has graced the pages of this blog before, but it’s clearly an undying classic and especially apropos in light of the latest TSA news

“Grandma Got Molested at the Airport”:

Finally I’ll leave you with a fave of another generation, Walt Kelly’s, “Deck Us All With Boston Charlie” (which, BTW, I can sing on demand, without any form of chemical encouragement. Be very glad I’m merely typing and not recording audio). Lyrics here in case you want to sing along:

Merry Christmas One And All!

Claire Wolfe

N-O-N database hack attempt; NSA suspected

Wednesday, December 23rd, 2015

Santa Claus confirms that the National Security Agency was behind the recent attempted hack on the Naughty Or Nice (NON) Database.

(LOL to MJR)

—–

tip-jar-SMALL





 
 


 
 

 
 
 
 
 
Copyright © 1998 - Present by Backwoods Home Magazine. All Rights Reserved.